Let’s Change The Way We Talk About Food

Gosh have I had my fair share of negative thoughts about food. So much so that they have ruined many moments, days, or even months at a time. Re-framing thoughts is part of a lot of therapies, and it’s true that what we think becomes the filter with which we see the world. I’m not here to preach positive thoughts or minimize the pain or struggles we’re experiencing — I’m offering a few different ways to think and talk about the food we eat. Working to reframe negative (often gut reaction) thoughts about food can be very freeing as you progress through learning how to trust your body.

Here’s a few examples:

Lots of diets try to tell us not to eat past a certain time. I can’t say for sure why each diet preaches this (some say it’s because our bodies store food as fat when eaten at night, which is not substantiated by science but my guess is their main idea is if we stop eating past a certain time, we’ll naturally eat less. Some people tend to overeat or binge late at night — this isn’t because nighttime somehow causes us to indulge. What’s more likely is we’ve been undereating all day so by the time it’s late we’re genuinely really hungry. Let me emphasize: this is quite normal and smart of our bodies to do. This is how we stay alive. If you’re struggling with the idea of eating late at night, perhaps reframing that thought into something more productive would help. Understand that our bodies do not turn off at night when we go to sleep. They are working 24/7 so if you are hungry at an odd hour of the night, you might not have eaten enough earlier that day. We usually don’t use the bathroom the same amount of times each day; likewise, sometimes our bodies just want more food on a certain day.

Another big diet myth is that we can wash away our hunger with a glass of water. I don’t know where this originated but it can be really problematic. Hunger and thirst are two different sensations, and one usually won’t satisfy the other. I would also get curious here and ask yourself why drinking water instead of eating is on your mind. Are you nervous about eating too much? Are you concerned about gaining weight? I certainly understand how stressful it can be to make food choices and would encouraged you to get curious about what typically happens when we try to stave off hunger with beverages. Practicing honoring our hunger in these moments can build trust that our bodies can tell us when we’re hungry and for how much.

There are some foods (typically higher in carbohydrates, fat or sugar) that feel scary to us, often because we’ve restricted them in the past. Our bodies and brains are really complex, and lots of research demonstrates the more we restrict a food, the more desirable it becomes. This could be for a few reasons: if we’re restricting our intake in general (i.e. we just aren’t eating enough overall), any food can become more desirable because we’re hungry. But often, we restrict certain types of foods while allowing others, and this just makes those “off-limit” foods more enticing. When we allow ourselves to eat said “off-limit” foods, they become less desirable. Note: this can take time and practice and if you’re feeling really overwhelmed or chaotic around food, it might be helpful to work through with a non-diet dietitian.

There’s a lot to unpack in this re-frame, but essentially it asks you to stop and consider how your past experiences with strict diets have turned out. How many times have you tried a diet that didn’t end well for you? At some point, we realize it’s not our fault. Diets don’t work and they create really messy relationships with food. There is another way to improve our health — it just might look different than we expected.

How unfortunate would it be if every time we ate a cookie, an alarm in our head went off that said “Ok! That’s it for the week! No more!” In this instance, we’re practicing quasi-food freedom. Sure, we’re letting ourselves eat the food, but there’s lots of rules around it. Instead, practicing food neutrality can remove the judgment when it comes to certain foods and allow us to eat what feels truly nourishing and satisfying in a given moment.